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Spider-Man 3: Crap

Spider-Man 3: Crap
Like too many other cattle looking for entertainment this past weekend, I went with some friends to go to Spider-Man 3. Boy, was that a mistake. A lot of people seem to be charitable saying that the movie, despite its flaws, was entertaining. I can't even say that much. I was close to walking out of the movie a handful of times, and it takes a lot for me to do that.
The script was horrendous and, in general, delivered poorly by the principals. The plot was held together by day-old chewing gum. The special effects were, admittedly, quite special, but the moviemakers forgot something: a great story! I couldn't believe that this, likely to be the biggest box office hit of this year, was a disappointment on so many levels. Weak story? Check. Crappy script? Check. Actors with no on-screen chemistry? Check. Crap singing and dancing? Check. Incoherent plot? Check. Waste of time? Check.
I imagine the bulk of the $250 Million budget went towards the special effects, and they were quite good. However they only seemed to look for an excuse to use more special effects instead of focusing on the damn story! I was also disappointed by the opening credits, as I have come to expect from many movies to deliver a really cool opening or ending credits sequence. At the end of the day, it really makes it clear that no amount of special effects can replace a good script and story.
What was up with Tobey Maguire? I have a lot of respect for him as an actor, but he really just brought his B-game. Same with Kirsten Dunst. I couldn't bring myself to really empathize with either of their characters, so I didn't care what the hell happened to them! Bruce Campbell, playing a French maitre d', was genuinely entertaining. Topher Grace also seemed to pull his part together quite well. But I would have to place most of the blame on the script and the directing, as ultimately these actors could only do so much with what they were given.
If you haven't seen it, don't waste your time. If you absolutely must (just because everyone else seems to have seen it), catch a matinee and leave your brain in your car. You'll need it more on the ride back home.


News Posted:13 years ago

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